Saturday, January 30, 2010

cards in the spokes.

today is beautiful. windows open, little chippy finches in the trees outside. it's a lazing about kind of beautiful. just got home after a fabulous brunch & browse with my lady friend. now i'm contemplating the many projects that need to be done at the shack.

in fact, i am contemplating a lot today. surprised? yeah, me either. but i'm feeling light about things. i know i've set things into motion for some positive changes in my i just have to figure out what kind of changes they need to be.

i'm thinking on a weird timeline too. jumping back and forth on different places in the time orbit. wondering what i'm going to make for dinner then what i want to do for my next career move. thinking about when to do laundry today and what i should be doing/living etc. by march 1st then october 1st. replaying conversations and events from last night's redpainting of the town and replaying conversations and events from years prior.

i've been thinking a lot about how differently i am going to try to live for the next six to seven months. how will i be able to scrimp and save and occupy my time without falling into the same spending/wilding cycles. should i try to pick up a second job so i can squirrel away more cash or should i devote my free time to making things to sell on the etsy shop i have been neglecting?

i'm a big believer in following one's intuition. every time i neglect mine it has unfortunate repurcussions. the problem i am facing is that my gut is not being very vocal. it's allowing my mind to confuse it so.

i feel pulled to so many things and so many places. places i have never even been to! i have my eyes on all types of potential careers and after listening to many many opinions about what i should do next, i ask my gut and it says "meh" with shrugged shoulders. what? since when is my gut a wishy washy wallflower? it's usually got sparklers in its teeth and is fond of jazz hands and megaphones. hmmm...

perhaps i need more silence in my life so that whatever it is my gut is trying to tell me can actually be heard. there has been an uproarious, disheveled sparkletini of a pixie making studio 54 out of my mind lately. which has its time and place but the time and place does not feel so appropriate at this juncture.

now i have to focus. my body and mind are great at telling me when to do that. isn't it funny that i can't just say i am good at doing that? my mind, body, party pixie, and gut all seem to exist as separate entities within me. it's pretty accurate. sometimes i do feel like i'm the only one at the party and sometimes i feel like i bring the entire cast of characters with me. i mean that in a sane way...i'm not sybil; or anne heche for that matter.

aaaanyway, sufficed to say i am inspired. i want to hold onto that. i want to get things done. like yesterday. i want to also enjoy this little bit of time i have with my friend before she leaves. it's hard to find a balance for all of that and maintain my cool when little glimpses into the future show me rather lonely.

alright. thanks for riding on the handlebars of my mental bicycle. i wish i had a little bell to ring as i bid a fond adieu to y'all for the day. brrrring brrrring. eh, good enough!
'til next time, folks!

Friday, January 29, 2010


and it's here. my weekend. my beloved precious, elusive sasquatch of a weekend. yeah baby. me and the lady friend are going to get dolled up and paint the town red. well, maybe not entirely red but i can muster up one good coat on my budget.
i have been in the funniest place today going off in little loopty-loops in my head; plowing through work and actually getting a lot done (which always feels good). now i am sitting on the bed with my favourite show on dvd, a delicious beer, and snugglebutt of a pup. life is really good. i actually have been mulling over so many things to write about today. concepts for opinion pieces and a few respectable rants but honestly...i'm just glad to be home. i'm glad to be feeling better and i have a pretty decent grin to match my relatively decent hair day.

'tis good, people. 'tis really good.

adieu for now!

*today's pic: snugglin' with the little man after a long day.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

fleeting little minute hands

where oh where do my mornings go? i've got 25 minutes to eat breakfast, write this here blog, do my hair and find something that is remotely clean to wear to work today. good morning kids! 'tis thursday and i am literally counting down the time i have left before my weekend begins.
last night my gal came over for a comfort food meal, but we didn't break vegetanuary. we had some delicious asparagus, portobello mushrooms, sweet potatoes, salad, and tbatchnick vegetable soup. we played a game, listened to music, and caught up on life. seven got his girlfriend fix too which is muy importante. they have a love thing going.

today i am feeling a tad better but still a little under the weather with some very stubborn sinus thing. blech. i am looking forward to coming home tonight (don't i say that every day?) and piddling around the shack. wrapping up christmas ornaments and precious things from my grandmother. i am feeling inspired to get the shack in better order tonight.
we'll see how i'm feeling by 5:30, but as of right now that's what i want. organization! i have to get the ball rolling, friends. there isn't much time to find a place and pack up the joint. that tingle of being in transition has my gypsy blood a-boilin'. makes me want to buy a horse-drawn carriage/cart and travel around like some freaky tom waits character selling fortunes and beaded scarves for $5 a pop.

well, now i have 11 minutes to eat breakfast, do my hair, and find something remotely clean to wear to work today. wish me luck!

i hope your day is productive and easy-going today. and perhaps a little mysterious and magical too. that's always nice.
adieu for now,
*today's pic: the fallen tree that has been outside my apartment since i moved in.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

chuggah chuggah chuggah chuggah choooo chooo.

guten tag! 'tis wednesday and i am running on some sort of adrenaline i wasn't aware i possessed. honestly with how ookie i have been feeling the past few days, i wasn't sure there was any energy in me anywhere...except, perhaps in my ability to analyze things (which always seems to be running at full steam).

i am being super efficient at work but i can feel that efficiency beginning to peter out now that i'm on my lunch break and snuggled on the couch next to a curious and stinky little pup. i would much rather stay here and sleep then go back and break down boxes and price a mountain of smell-good soaps and what-not.

fast-forward to tonight and i am having my gal come over for some comfort food and y'know what? i may overlook vegetanuary for the night just to enjoy the delicious hearty goodness of one of my favourite recipes. don't gasp, friends. for i have had one non-vegetarian meal this january because it was one of my favourite dishes. and though i am a stickler for seeing things like vegetanuary through to the finish (and will continue to do so), i also realize that you only live once and i had the chance to nosh a fave i did and it was SO worth it.

well, at the moment it was. my body went a little apey in response to the non-vegetable fare but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. and i had to feed that craving. i don't even know why i'm telling y'all this, it was over a week and a half ago. oh well...confessions of a foodie.

the point is, i am not fully equipped for anything of substance today except comfort food and jammies. once again, counting down the hours until i can crawl my bootie up the stairs to my shack sweet shack.

speaking of the shack, it is looking emptier and emptier now that i am attempting to clean it out for the move. can homegirl get some snaps please? it's quite a feat!

adieu for now...excuse the complete and utter (heh udder) rabbit trail this post has become.


*today's pic: me head hurts. me wants to stay home.

Tuesday, January 26, 2010


just a little something to listen to if'n you're so inclined... some danish boys known as Efterklang. it's got a bit of a bon iver vibe to it in places which is good because my head is so full of back-firing pontiacs today that this song is a welcome escape. enjoy!

don't call it a comeback.

good morning friends! 'tis tuesday and i am not ready for my weekend to be over. i know it's a little late to say that considering it's been over for about 9 hours. i got a lot done yesterday (well i got some stuff done, it may not have been a lot) and that made me feel better about the fact that i had to crawl back into bed by 5 pm.
i'm not sure if it was something i ate or the weekend i spent surrounded by cigarrette smoke, i felt just horrible. i wallered in bed, watched anchorman and barely slept. meh.

today i am not up to snuff but i'm better than i was yesterday (because i choose to be!) and looking forward to coming home tonight, practicing guitar (because i have been slack since last week), tidying up and probably watching anchorman again.
my goal this week is to stay in. it's my challenge. it's not really so challenging anymore though because i feel a little burned out on socializing in general. that and i'm ba-roke.

oh and in case you were wondering...the christmas tree has been disassembled. now i have to figure out how to get it back in the box. it seems to be about 3 times the size it was when it was packaged. hmmm...

next stop: clearing out the boxes in my "laundry room" so that i may reuse them to pack up for the move.

adieu for now youngins!

*today's pic: jumping up on the settee and taking pictures in front of my art wall...because i'm a grown-up and i'm allowed to.

Monday, January 25, 2010

follow the ramble

i am so happy to be home today that i could cry. i have goals for this fine monday and am trying to organize the crazy schedule i have going this week. i am attempting to stifle the panic about the speed in which the weeks are whizzing by (though they seem to crawl at the shop for some reason). i know that in a matter of weeks i will be 28, have to find a new living situation, and one of my best girls will be leaving tally and i will be missing her. a lot.

i spent last week avoiding the shack. colour me in denial about everything. so this week i plan on spending more time here getting things done.

i'm starting to feel like a real loser that my christmas tree is still up. someone even mentioned it to me recently when i said i hadn't taken it down yet. "didn't you say on your blog that you would do that like a week ago?" ouch. guess i oughtta, huh? people are starting to hold me accountable for things i say on here...whoopsie. heh. so the faux fir is coming down today. i'm actually kind of sad about it but this holiday season was so odd for so many reasons, it'll be good energy to clean it out of here.

i feel like such a grown-up that i have a faux christmas tree that i HAVE to store now. it's daunting and funny that i possess as much holiday decorating items as i do. considering that with the goals i have in mind for myself, i will have to be living with much less in my new place (hopefully). i don't know if i should just try to sell everything that i've accumulated to finance the flurry of dental torture appointments i have to have this year; and the potential death of a belt in jane honda that keeps whirring/squealing at me only when i'm my most psychologically fragile and can't wrap my head around how much it would suck if she broke down.

those money woes and the fact that i am prit much pissed at my credit card balance right now has me fantasizing about winning the lottery or finding a sugar daddie. if someone would just hand me $10,000 i could stop freaking about everything. well, i'll never stop freaking about something but the dental surgery would be done, jane honda would be taken care of and a happy girl once again, no credit card worries, apartments successfully transferred, storage unit secured and filled...and some left over for a few new outfits for little mama because my stuff's been looking a little pitiful lately. that's not asking too much is it? maybe i should put a digital donation jar on here so people who feel bad for me can keep me from complaining by putting a dollar in it or whatever.

ha! or whatever.

adieu for now, kids...thanks for attempting to follow the ramble.

*today's pic: accomplishing much by sifting through grandma's button box. i used to play with all the trinkets in there for hours when i was a youngin.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

showing up.

good afternoon friends. 'tis sunday. i have enjoyed my day so much thus far that my mind has created for itself a lazy, meandering stream with little paper boats floating down it.
i'm not panicking about moving apartments, and i'm not worried about work. i'm not exhausted, i'm not grumpy, i'm not complaining about this or that. i'm not beating myself up for anything.

i'm swaying along to van morrison. i'm crafting new perspectives. i'm taking funny pictures and kissing the little buddy. i'm listening to the blustery wind outside. i'm listening to so many things.

i am here today. i showed up.
i hope your day has manifested for you something lovely.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

que loco.

feng shui energies beware, i am dislocating all of my cures and redoing, regrouping, reorganizing, re-re-ing the funky little shack little by little. it may be one of the reasons why i was a beast today at work. i mean a pathetic, teary, headachey, bear. there are a slew of reasons actually for this discombobulation and general furrowed brow-ness.

regardless, as a courtesy to the shopping public, i came home early from the shop. now after several hours of convalescing, old saturday night live episodes, and amazing music i am prit much ready to go for a fun night of shakin' ma bootie and laughing a lot. hell, i may even wear something cute and brush my hair.

look out world, it's saturday and the bipolar delight is wringing a smile out of the dirty dish rag that has been her mouth all day.

adieu for now,

*little dreamy dramaboat watching kinky friedman on the telly.

Friday, January 22, 2010


because i don't talk about myself nearly enough, here are some weird facts about me.
1. i love the colour burnt orange, as well as leopard print and amethysts. my grandmother and i shared these affinities.
2. i collect dia de los muertos figurines. i get one for myself every birthday.
3. i want to look like marisa tomei in "only you". with the little pixie haircut and tiny gold hoop earrings. plus that badass backless white outfit that only she could wear.
4. i have kind of always wanted to be a bartender. it's not so terribly different from what i do now. talk to people, and sell them things they don't necessarily need. plus it'd be a nice change to see the world from the other side of the bar.
5. sometimes i think i'd like to end up owning a piece of property somewhere beautiful and living a simple and artistic life. perhaps have a few nekkid youngins running around. or goats. i've always wanted a pet goat.
6. i could quite possibly be paul giamatti's biggest fan.
7. i have ordered the exact same thing at a thai restaurant in town for 26 years. the most delicious cashew chicken. i have to go there at least twice a year just to get my fix.

hope you enjoyed the random silliness, kiddos! more to come later.
*tired lu at work and further photographic evidence that i probably shouldn't wear aviators.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

overanalyzing apologizing philosophizing.

today is drizzly in tally. 'tis welly season. i am currently taking a few moments on my lunch break (between my zealous consumption of tomato soup and grilled cheese sammiches) to send a few words out to you fine people in interwebsland.
yesterday i was a giddy mess. non-stop giggles and wry smiles. it was awesome for it has been a good long while since i have been that awash in sheer junior high-type silliness. and because i am an air sign and waft along the emotional breezes, today i am deep in thought. partially because there is nary a customer in the shop and partially because i haven't taken the time to overanalyze (ha! i mean analyze...)everything i have said in the past few days. well, i have made the time to do so today.
sometimes i speak without filter. i assume my openness is appreciated though i know it is not, all too often. i look back on things i have said years ago and still cringe beyond cringe that i opened my mouth at all. what a dolt i can be! ish kabibble.
the reason i beat myself for saying the wrong things sometimes is that i am mortified at the thought of making people feel bad. i know that i am human and humans do really horrible things to one another but i really don't try to be cruel to people or insult them or make them feel in any way disposable.
it's kind of this code that i have created for myself. people make me feel like crap or totally frickin' nuts all the time but i don't want to do that to others. yet sometimes i hear myself say things that come off as insensitive or callous.
so, to any and all who i may have done this to over the years and even recently, please know that it's okay to tell me that i've offended/upset you. sometimes i assume that i have when i haven't (which is most likely the case today) and the opposite is also true.
each person is in my world for a reason, even if you think it's a diminuative reason, i probably do not consider it as such. my most sincere apologies are being sent out there. i am trying to evolve here, be patient with me.
adieu for now,
*today's pic: i love this rosamund print and wanted to take a picture of myself with it. i am aware how weird that sounds.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

if you just smile.

good morning campers! 'tis wednesday (i think). only four more days of work this week and i am in great spirits today. feeling more centered, and a little more motivated. i have a lot i need to do and though the only things on the checklist i can actually check off are that i did one (out of five) loads of laundry and cleaned (sort of) the shack. i am moving at a snail's pace though today, obviously, i need to be at work really soon but haven't even had my coffee yet. all that aside, i am smiling. though i smile often, this one's coming from inside. i just feel more at peace today and it's bubbling forth. i hope to spread some of that today. my life is good, despite the piddly (and sometimes devastating drama therein). i realize i am blessed exponentially. with the recent events in haiti, my heart is pouring out to those souls. i will be sending some positivity and peaceful energies thataway. care to join?

i promise i will write more substance and items of interest at some point (and yes i am aware i have been promising that for weeks now) but, i have been a little bit of a cadet lately.

adieu from spaaaaace...


*right pic: me and little man last night having a moment.
*top pic: the fog this morning.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

brace yourself, she's a treat today.

good morning friends. 'tis tuesday and yes i skipped a post. i'm not really sure why other than the fact that i was kind of "oh-look-something-sparkly" all day yesterday. i did a sufficient amount of relaxing, spent time with wonderful people and generally avoided anything practical all day long.
in reality i'm a little frustrated with myself for spending too much money, and shirking my responsibilities. but, i am going to have to forgive myself for it eventually. i have given myself until the end of the work day today to waller about all the things i'm frustrated with myself for; then it has to get packed up and shipped off to make room for the worries that actually matter. ha!

i've slacked on yoga, slacked on health, on meditation, on cleaning, and on making my bed. for shame little lu! but today, thankfully is a new day. i've got ideas for this week and i wonder if i will be able to make them happen. i am seriously hoping, but i have been known to be exceptionally prone to beating myself up if i don't succeed at what i think i should be succeeding at.
whew lawd! mama needs to find her center and stop thinking so much! i'm a little bit of a handful today. but you know what? that is okay. it is alright to have days where not much gets done (two weeks in my case). it is also acceptable, as a human (which i have to keep reminding myself i am), to admit that sometimes you just don't know what the hell you are doing and that that simple fact is overwhelming.
that is how i have been feeling lately. frightened that i am some kind of failure when i know i am not. not really sure where it's coming from either but have my optimism shoes on and they are really excellent for trudging through all the mire and kicking down the little ankle-biting creatures all around.
that's all for now, a little monday recap and tuesday psychosis for you. more to come as the day unfolds (as does the origami in my head).
*monday's pic: a quiet moment during the dazed trio's marathon monday.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

a most welcomed sunday

okay so good afternoon friends. 'tis sunday and little lu has had a weekend filled with funsies. today i am relaxing at the shack. it is wonderful! coffee, movies, mac & cheese and a tiny bit of focus that is inspiring me to make some lists. you know i love lists.

my weekend? friday night i went to a fundraiser for a friend who had an expensive surgery. lots of music, lots of food, lots of old friends catching up. that was a good time. yesterday i worked, on very little sleep mind you, napped when i got home and had resigned myself to a night in until someone i never get to see invited me out. thus, with a faint mew the party kitten emerged into the evening only to make it back to the shack in the wee hours, a beast exhausted from laughter and merriment and socializing.

when i finally got up today after a somewhat peaceful nine hours of sleep, i felt a wave of overstimulated synapses and senses. the shack is quiet, the little man is groggy, and i am piddling around thinking a lot. it is good for my soul.

on the agenda for this week...
1. take down my christmas tree. it's ridiculous that it's still up.
2. laundry. it's starting to move on its own.
3. clean and purge and organize the shack. i am starting to see just how much stuff i have accumulated in my lifetime. knick-knacks & tchotchkes, mountains of papers, random craft supplies, and mis-matched socks. it's almost impressive but not really.
4. practicing more selflessness. i woke up feeling like i have been rather selfish lately. uncool. homeskillet's gonna work on that most definitely. my focus needs to be shifted.
5. quiet. my ears feel like they are ringing today from all the riotous fun i have been having. i see yoga, and long walks ahead of me this week. i am quite looking forward to it.

i hope your sunday is fantastic in whatever capacity you need it to be.
adieu from the funky little shack!
*pics: this lovely blustery sunday afternoon. friday, wearing sunglasses at night. saturday night social butterfly.

Friday, January 15, 2010

pragmatic, goal-oriented lu

howdy!!! well, it's friday thank goodness! only one more day of work before my weekend officially begins. tonight, i plan on enjoying myself just a little bit. a pre-weekend as it were because i envy my friends who enjoy that relief that friday evenings bring. me wants some of that!

last night i had a great guitar lesson and just a fun evening in general. it sent me through a long friday with a little bit of bounce in my step. not that i have a terribly bouncy bounce in my step considering the onslaught of bizarre dreams i have been having lately have left me a little drowsy; but i have been in an amiable mood all day long. how nice!

tonight my goals are as follows:

1. laugh a lot preferably until my eyes tear up a little.

2. engage people with sincerity, and delight in their company.

3. avoid awkward moments as much as possible...if possible. ha!

4. not torment my body too much since i have to go to work in the morning.

5. shake ma bootie.

i love being goal-oriented! i think i can wrap my head around this to-do list. well, most of it!

happity friday fellers!

much love and merriment to you!


*today's pic: friday party pants

Thursday, January 14, 2010

seven, whiskey, maracas, and teddy pendergrass.

what's up amigos?! it's thursday night and i am getting ready to make some delicious food for my guitar teacher; but before i do so, i had to waller on the ground with the baby (who is home after a four day vacation from mama!) and post a little somfin for you fine people who check in with me every so often.

today has been pretty damn good. i woke up wanting to put my whiskey shoes on, which is really no good way to wake up on a workday...and the morning. but i resisted (i would be horribly disappointed in myself if i had given in to whiskey in the middle of the day) and despite my general feeling of scrappiness, i have thoroughly enjoyed this day i have been given.

i have a couple of things rattling around in the ole noggin today. i have had a weird week filled with really great and really odd things. my dreams have left me so exhausted each morning that i haven't gotten a decent night's rest since maybe saturday or sunday night.

concern about finding a new apartment that fits in the parameters of my budget and lease term; and a trip to nashville i have to plan-pay for-and take within the next two weeks have added to the noisy pair of maracas that are the hemispheres of my brain. if i can't do the nashville thing in that amount of time, i will have to wait until march when i have moved into the next place. hmm...what to do? what to do?

oh well, i'm about to make some music and some pork tenderloin (para el profesor, not for me...i'm eating leftover vegetarian spaghetti like a good girl). i truly hope i have something more interesting to offer tomorrow. and i hope i used the proper spanish word for "for" as well. sheeesh.

in the meantime, a little something dedicated to the late, great teddy pendergress, may he rest in peace.

adieu for now,
*today's pic: on the floor after wrastlin' with little man!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

two shakes and a wiggle

well well well, didn't this day fly by? wowsa. here i am, at the funky little shack after another long day, trying to avoid cleaning before my lovelies come over for home-cooked vegetarian spaghtetti. i'm succeeding at my procrastination by multi-tasking. writing a blog, paying a student loan, texting, cooking, and listening to the tom waits station on pandora. i have to say i'm doing a darn good job. meanwhile the house is beginning to consume itself out of neglect and an ever-growing pile of laundry. oh well.

today has been good. very good. much better than yesterday. oi. yesterday was a doozie. however, i had several people let me know i am loved; and just knowing they are there for me is incredibly moving.

today has been about laughter and there has been a lot of it. i hope it continues well into the evening. at this moment, there is a bit o' bootie shakin' happening at the shack and you know what? sometimes you have to eschew your requisite daily tasks for a bit, crank up the pogues, howlin' wolf, or "get behind the mule" and just shake what yer mama gave ya. consider it done from the funky little shack. over and out kiddos!

adieu for now,


Tuesday, January 12, 2010

stubborn optimism

good afternoon kids. today is another lovely, chilly january day in tally. i am in an unusual headspace today (what else is new?) in regard to that little switch inside of me that, when off, keeps me the free-spirited creature you know and love (or tolerate); but when flipped stirs in me a blunt seriousness and practicality that can be, well...intense.

the thing is, today my switch keeps getting flipped. thankfully, meditation plus some positive thoughts texted to me today, have aided in my ability to turn it back off when it does. however, i simply feel tested.

this afternoon, i have been trying to find quotes that offer positive reinforcement. little reminders that happiness is a choice. every bit helps, right?

most people are about as happy as they make their minds up to be. ~abraham lincoln

action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action. ~benjamin disraeli

it is only possible to live happily ever after on a day to day basis. ~margaret bonnano

the greatest part of our happiness depends on our dispositions, not circumstances. ~martha washington

take a breath with me friends...every little thing is going to be alright.

adieu for now,


*today's pic: at work, seeking brief solace in nature.

Monday, January 11, 2010

about as focused as a spider monkey on speed.

good morning kids! 'tis monday and i am so very happy to be...well, not at work. i am doing quite well minus one or two little things. one thing i am not the biggest fan of in my personal sphere is that i can be a real butthead when i've lost my patience with certain things. i was just a big one to someone. i have apologized but not sure to what avail. oh well, the buttheadiness comes from a place of love, believe it or not, but that's just the way it goes sometimes. i digress.

today the buddy is at his dad's. i miss him already. isn't that pitiful? not seeing that little poufy face throughout the day is kind of getting to me even though he's only been gone 3 hours. i know he's happy running in circles in the backyard because he hasn't gotten to do that in a long time. silly mama. que ridiculo!

well, i'm looking around the funky little shack and adding yet another task to the ever-growing to-do list. it makes me kind of want to hide out at the bookstore for a few hours to clear my mind. the procastinator returns. unfortunate timing though, because i have a ton of stuff i have to get organized now that i'm not renewing the lease for the shack. trying not to panic; but pretending i don't have to worry about it a little bit isn't helping.

it's a lovely day here in tally. i am thoroughly enjoying the erykah badu station on pandora and this arctic front that rolled through has been wonderful! i despise hot weather and have been happy as a clam in 28 degree weather. what a terrible floridian i can be! living in a place with distinct seasons sounds just heavenly to me. gracious my head is in 30 places this morning, sorry guys!

clearly, i have a lot of things rolling about in the ole noggin, i keep putting them off or simmering them on a back burner in my mind instead of just dealing with them. perhaps that's what i should do today. oh but the bookstore is calling me! well, it is my day off, i reckon i can do whatever i want to, huh? i have to remind myself i am a grown-up sometimes (often actually). ha! wish me luck today, kiddos!

adieu for now,
*today's pic: lulu and possibly the worlds largest cup of coffee.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

take a minute, just sit right there...

good evening friends. 'tis sunday and i have had the most lovely, peaceful day with my friend. last night we celebrated a big success. she and i shared the evening glammed up and in the company of another exceptional comrade; we hit the town and wowed onlookers with our trio of sheer ferocity. once in a while, one must simply have an evening that fabulous.
today there have been giggles, and food, and conversations that do the soul some kind of good.
today has been beautiful.
i hope the same for you, dearies. most definitely.
more later as i am off to continue enjoying myself.
*today's pic: taking a moment to reflect on my blessings.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

the attention span of a gnat

good morning campers! 'tis saturday and me and the buddy are at the shop snuggled in from the 20 degree morning as much as we can be. i love love love this weather! it was so awesome to walk outside and see ice on the the ever-so-beautiful retaining pond behind the shop. ha! the glories of nature...sort of.

i am in an unusual mood today. it is a feeling of having a little power (for lack of a better word) in my life. i believe that in reality no one has complete power over their lives, there will always be things out of our control. there's an odd comfort in that. but i am feeling strong today. it feels damn good. i feel like she-ra princess of power, but a brunette and without the unicorn.

last night, i had a relaxing evening in with friends. lots of conversations, a mushie tofu stir-fry (my bad), and a few guilty pleasure videos from you tube (toni braxton says what?) and i would say it was an overall success.

i am looking forward to some light-heartedness though. perhaps a dressy (albeit artery-freezing) evening out with friends? hmmmm? and in the spirit of dressiness...that's right...the fantasy shopper is back with a little etsy gem fer ya today. enjoy! gallo nu riding jacket. $150 me wants this saucy jacket . it would be so perfect to cozy up in today.


*p.s. this is the morning ice. so pretty and somewhat sparkly!

Friday, January 8, 2010

um, excuse me, your ribbon is on fire.

good morning, friends! 'tis friday and i find myself once again at the shop drinking coffee and repeating the same three sentences over and over again to the onslaught of browsers. *sigh*

alls well though. i have gotten a lot done at the shop despite my general lack of enthusiasm and have set my sights toward this evening and some much needed home-cookin' and gal pal time.
i had a truly enjoyable evening last night. i met up with one friend and received an excellent mix cd as a gift. i have been bobbin' my head to it in the back of the shop all morning. i had a wonderful visit with said friend and enjoyed a suitcase full of priceless anecdotes, laughter and a cheers or two. it threaded a lovely, warm placidity throughout me.

afterward i met up with another friend, of whom i have not spent any measurable time with in nearly two years. it was truly delightful to catch up and drink wine and have a bit of intelligent and engaging conversation.

*this is from last night. there is a guy at the wine bar that plays with fire every thursday. i found it entertaining.

i must say, even with my mind being the spastic ribbon dance it has been lately, each day i am finding yet another thing that brings me peace or happiness, and makes me smile. it helps me maintain. maintaining is magnificent and will directly lead to thriving; and i am all about that.

i think the meditation is helping too. i began with the shortest time i can sit still before my brain takes off a-runnin'; but i will be gradually increasing the time i commit to it each day. despite this little success, i do have to say that my dreams have been much more intense and realistic lately. those of you who know how bizarre and detailed my dreams are normally, know that this means i have been a sleepy girl all week long.

i woke myself up talking in my sleep for the third night in a row last night. tuesday night i dreamed that one of my friends was hiding under my bed because he was sad. when i woke up, i immediately looked under the bed to see if he was there because it was SO real.

last night i dreamed a male friend of mine went into labor and that i got a text message saying he had a healthy baby weighing 8 lbs, 3 oz. or something like that. i woke up this morning and checked my phone right away just to see if there really was a text (even though, as a somewhat logical woman, i knew he wouldn't have actually had a baby). ha! who knows what any of that means, if anything. but it is rather amusing nonetheless.

well, my pangaeans, i hope your friday is a mondo fabulous good time! i am off to get a bit more work theory.

adieu for now,

*today's picture is me playing with the triptych mirror at the shop.

Thursday, January 7, 2010

the essential desirability of spontenaity

good afternoon dearies! 'tis thursday and i am in a most fantastic (if not silly) mood. thank goodness the funk is lifting! i knew my propensity toward optimism (plus wonderful, caring friends) would nip that little blues jam right in the bud.

i'm sure you will not be surprised to hear that i didn't make it to the grocery store yesterday. and no i didn't eat wrapping paper for breakfast, even though i totally burned my pancakes and nearly went stark, raving mad because of it.

i went, instead to see a friend to get a fix of positive energy which was much needed to help push me even further out of my funketyfunk; which despite my best efforts kept coming at me in waves. isn't it wonderful to know there are people you can call and say..."hey, i need a hug" and their answer will always be "come on over!"? it did my heart good.

my mind is grappling with a few biggies today just trying to carve them into more easily digestible pieces. deadlines are frightening to me and having to work within a limited timeframe is daunting. thankfully i have a friend who is willing to sit with me and help me break things down so i'll stop wigging out. i am blessed with my support system, truly.

i began my second book of the new year. technically i restarted it. i began it last year in february. but last year was such a flurry of insanity that i put it down for it was too heavy at the time. it's called the essential spontaneous fulfillment of desire, by deepak chopra.

i know i know, it's deepak chopra. i was almost embarrassed to buy it but i thought the title had a nice positive connotation. it's about the interconnectedness of everything. a concept i have thought about often especially when the unusual things that happen to me occur once again. it's fun to learn and philosophize and make new wrinkles in my brain. it's been a while. my next book will have to be lighter fare though, for i can only philosophize so much before i'm tempted to make a toga out of my bedsheets and lounge on the steps of public buildings discussing the cosmic merit of packing peanuts.

ha! on that note, i'm going to get back to work. enjoy this beautiful day, friends!


*me at the shop today, amusing myself with the chandelier crystals.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

like a pancake

how do, kiddos? oh don't worry, today's post is light and fluffy. though just about everything is compared to the heaviness of yesterday's. i do have to say the moment i finished that epic post, i felt better. it's all kind of basic "duh" stuff to most everybody and even to me at times. i mean, i'm no dumbie. i know all of these things about myself but i did think i had broken that cycle many months before, only to be somewhat devestated to find that i hadn't. but no worries on the homefront for this little mama! i've already unspooled the silver thread and have been stitching away for hours. yes ma'am!

today has been a long day. i love having the shop to myself during market weeks but at the same time, it's a little draining doing it all by my lonesome. having the puppums there with me helps a lot because he reminds me to take a moment, get down on the floor, wrastle and giggle. that does wonders for the soul, man lemme tell ya!

tonight i made myself the most unhealthy vegetarian dinner outside of twinkies and ho-hos. my kitchen is so devoid of food that i scrounged, and gathered to make a facsimile meal just to fill the ole belly. that way when i go to the grocery store and actually get delicious good-for-me's, i won't blow my whole budget in one fell swoop...or swipe rather.

there are so many things i need to do. if i think about them too long i get overwhelmed. of course, i need to clean the funky little shack, but i always say that i think. i need to straighten nearly every square inch of this apartment. and it's so bloody cold outside (wonderfully so!) that i am almost tempted to just stay in and clean instead of going to the grocery store. i'm almost tempted. if i don't buy food i will end up eating leftover christmas wrapping paper for breakfast and we just can't have that.

so, off i go, my pets. more tomorrow. more light, more fluffy. i hope your evening is delightful (much more healthy than mine thus far), creative, and relaxing.

adieu for now!


*this is me practicing my guitar like a good girl tonight when i came home from work. yes it was unplugged (i have neighbours!) yay me anyway!

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

it's a long post but please read it, friends.

alright kids, here's the scoop. i stubbed the toe of my soul recently. well, it's been a long, painful, repetitive, masochistic soul-stubbing that has lasted several weeks (years actually) but only today did i figure out a way to not only find the band-aids, but also how to use them; and perhaps find a new way of walking so as not to stub dem toes like that anymore. confused? no worries.
i have acquired a yearning for peace over the past few years. well, i didn't acquire it as much as fought tooth-and-nail for the right to feel as if i deserve it. leaving the battlefield with not just flesh wounds but severed limbs. i have nursed myself back to health (and even let people help reattach hands and legs a little here and there too...imagine that!) but hit a dip in this recovery as of late.
over any stretch of time you can imagine, i have successfully beaten myself into a bloody pulp physically and emotionally. now let me also say this is not a continous feeling but it rears its ugly head every so often and sufficiently kicks my ass when it does. regardless, today i fully realized i have had enough.
anyway, throughout my life, some form of chaos or drama has felt relatively normal at times. i don't know what that says about me, or my past, or my childhood yadda yadda yadda. it's just the truth. i had worked for a while and had finally gotten to a place where when things were quiet, i didn't panic anymore. that is until recently.
this all sounds worse than it really is (i have a tendency to over-describe ala dickens). but to me, the self-flagellation came from the fact that i have created cycles for myself that keep me in chaos because it feels "safe" and it really boils down to fear.
many moons ago i acknowledged that i have a monumental fear of failure. it's kind of hilarious if you know me because i'm the most public fail-er around. if i'm going to fall flat on my ass it's going to be in front of every person i know. but the truth is, i know how to do that. i know how to fail. i fail at all kinds of things all the time. why is it that a fear of failure keeps me doing these things over and over again? it's because i fear failing at the things i want the most. i know, it's some deep stuff. hang in there, though.
i have wanted to leave the little nest of a town i live in for a very long time. but i've been terrified for a myriad of reasons. leaving family, my support group, money, comforts etc. but what i'm really afraid of doing is saying goodbye to my memories. of stepping out of the sepia-toned safety of this little universe and into the blinding light and frightening shadows of the life i have always dreamed of. a life in which i do not keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again. that world is foreign and doesn't yet make any sense to me. *ha! upon re-reading that sentence i must admit that i am aware i will make new mistakes if i can manage to stop making the old ones no matter where i live.
several weeks ago a barrage of love, amends, and well-wishes began to swell around me. i cast a lot of old baggage into the river and made room for new people to join my world. very cool stuff.
the epiphany that boxed my ears today was that i need to stop following the white rabbits of my life (and we each have several of our own). i am a big girl in many facets of my life but not all of the important ones. that is where i need to grow. long story long...i am making room for positive, life-changing things to happen to me, and for me by exiting the scarcity-focused world i am used to (what is wrong with me? why do i do this? why do i say that?) and entering an abundance-focused world by giving to others.
today, i finished reading 29 Gifts. i am going to begin this challenge for myself this week. 29 gifts (time, money, anything!) given with love and intention for 29 days. i will not post about this as the experiment is in progress because i want each to be uniquely given and received without any concern about what people think of it etc.
i mention it because...well, this is big for me. i want the people who know me and care enough to check in here with me to know that a big, happy realization occurred today and that i am feeling exceptionally optimistic, peaceful, and even attempting this pesky thing called forgiving myself for being human.
you my friends, all play a part in this acknowledgement. if i didn't have your lovely souls in my world, i wouldn't understand the concept of gratitude in the sincere manner in which i do.
stay with me, folks. it will only get better. i sincerely care for each of you and thank you for taking the time to join me.
adieu for now,

miss interpret with her sash & tiara

good morning friends! 'tis tuesday and the beginning of take the puppums to work week. he doesn't know it but he's going to be spending some major quality time with mama. he doesn't like going to work with me because of all the noise and people bustling about but it's a slow week (always is after christmas) and i adore having him with me all day.

i am feeling a bit better this morning. i had some dreams last night that have me a little on edge because i know what they were about. plus i slept late because of the aforementioned dreams; but i meditated last night, read several chapters in 29 Gifts, and got some laundry done. so, my head is definitely in a better place today because i feel like i accomplished something. oh, and i made my bed. it is the little victories, right guys?

today is gorgeous. cold and sunny. i am so glad i woke up with a moticum of peace so that i may enjoy it more thoroughly. i am going to try to figure out and perhaps even wrangle some of the more wayward thoughts that keep circling in my head (like the wind inside an aluminum quote edie brickell).

i made a fabulous cup of coffee in my new french press i was given for christmas (which is convenient because yesterday, i ran out of the coffee i have to use for the special coffee maker i got for christmas last year). it is some kind of delicious, though lemme tell ya!

well, i reckon i better hit the showers, i have to be at work in 20 minutes! i am so spoiled living across the street from the office.

here's to a fantastic day filled with peace, and problem-solving!

adieu for now, darlings!

*my view this morning. how gorgeous!

Monday, January 4, 2010

i was kissing valentino by a clear blue italian stream.

good afternoon friends. today is kind of one of those days. you know the kind i mean. here's the deal, my mind is insanely active today and i'm having a hell of a time getting it to focus on anything other than the flea market/mud-boggin' tractor pull that is inside of it.

i'm back at work today after a good long vacation. the store looks great albeit empty. the day has been busy but quiet (thank goodness); but i am greatly looking forward to coming home tonight and hanging out with the baby and perhaps sorting through all of the silly string in my mind.

i feel so discombobulated today that i can't even tell if the sentences i've written already make any sense. argh. me and my silly rabbit hole of a brain.

sufficed to say i will be taking some time for myself this week. i say it often, but i denied myself of it this weekend and i'm paying for it today. i feel prickly.

despite all of this, i am happy to be doing alright in other aspects of my life. i'm doing great with my resolutions thus far (even making my bed every day). i feel inspired to do some purging at the funky little shack too, which always gets me kind of riled up. i love organizing. perhaps the physical act of doing so will help with my mental stuff.'s hoping!

well, kids, i have to run back to work, now.



*me and little buddy on my lunch break today. love my little man. i'd be lost without him.

lesson learned.

sunday's post: a few hours behind because the computer was down.

three things about my weekend:

1. no tequila shots for lulu ever again. period. just take a gander at that ravishing creature wedged into the couch cushions there. mmmhmm, yeah.

2. sunday fundays with friends are great for curing what ails you. i had a fabulous day with wonderful people and i am so very grateful for it.

3. 3D movies in the front couple of rows of the theatre make people ill. it was like the blair witch project all over again. but at least the movie (avatar) was interesting.

there's actually a whole lot that was going through my head yesterday when i wanted to post but because i am kind of behind the game a little bit, i simplified.

adieu for now, friends. more to come!


Saturday, January 2, 2010

skinny love

good morning friends, we're on day two! do you know how hard it is to practice being a vegetarian while at the cracker barrel? pretty darn challenging to tell you the truth. but i ate my black eyed peas (and applesauce, steak fries, and green beans) like a good girl.

today i am feeling a little funny. well-rested on the verge of over-rested. i slept hard, partially because i didn't get a lot of sleep the night before, and partially because i did my meditation before bed; and by the last breath of it my body had almost gone completely limp. ha! meditation lightweight.

today i am drinking coffee and listening to bon iver. most likely another reason why my mood is sooooo lowkey today. i am hoping to get some things crossed off of the ole to-do list today (i cannot believe it is saturday already), plus make some time for a date with a delightful friend. i have put off so many things over the course of this breakcation but i was hoping to actually DO some stuff today. basic, practical things have fallen to the wayside in favour of making memories and being a little antagonistic to my body. but i wasn't cruel to it yesterday and i won't be today either. yay me!

one of the things i wanted to work on this year is reading all the books in my house. so i'm going to attempt to read at least two books a month every month this year. my first book of the year is called 29 Gifts (How A Month Of Giving Can Change Your Life) by Cami Walker. it is book detailing a plan that opens yourself up for positive things to happen to you by focusing your energies on helping other people. it's pretty cool and i wanted to start the year off on a positive, open, and more giving note. in fact one of my other resolutions (i think i'm up to 8 or 9 at this point) is to give more in kindness to others. it can be so hard for me to step outside of myself. i can almost always give encouraging words but feel like i just kind of fall short after that. however accurate that statement is in reality, it's just how i feel sometimes.

well, that is where i am at today...thanks for stopping by my little corner of the universe for a skinny minute. i hope your day is incredibly rad (and practical if need be) too!
adieu for now, friends! i'm off to make my bed!

*top image is my backyard view this beautiful morning. i love the way the sun moves around there.
*here's me and the buddy enjoying our morning together. he was whimpering because i was keeping him from his tennis ball. love that nutty buddy.

Friday, January 1, 2010

on your mark, get!!!!

gooood morning 2010! actually it's afternoon, but the exuberance is the same. i am glad i went out last night and spent time with lovely people. it was one of the most enjoyable new year's i have had in the better part of a decade (though there were a few key players absent whom i missed). the evening is still overall considered to have been a roaring success.

today begins vegetanuary. and of course i woke up this morning with such a craving for bacon it was indecent. but so far so good. i'm really looking forward to coming up with some creative veggie recipes for the next 31 days. i see some roasts and soups in my future...and stir fry. oh! good gracious i'm hungry. i must stop discussing food.

i have decided i am going to try to post a picture every day documenting this next year. i think it will be fun and a challenge and give me the opportunity to view things a little differently knowing i must have a record of some beautiful part of each day.

little bud and i are homebound today, methinks. we both need baths and i have to straighten the apartment (and jane honda). but i am seriously considering slinking off to a movie sometime this afternoon or evening for a little date with myself.

also on todays list: yoga. meditation. journaling. and all in all working on some things i'd like to make new habits of this upcoming year (preferably permanent habits at that).

the day is gorgeous here in tally this fine new year's day. we had a blue moon last night which i thought was exceptionally cool. the weather is crisp and windy (yay!), the sun is peeking out, i am feeling positive, encouraged, inspired, and truly happy today. what a great beginning!

here's to you, friends (toasting with a cup of joe)! let's do it up right, this go 'round. we are equipped for happiness and success!

love to you all!