search engine rant no. 2

there is this company, whose name escapes me, that makes supercool garden gnomes. not the cheesy kind but anthropologie-type cool ones. they're about 2 1/2 feet tall and come in a myriad of pretty colours. i wanted to send a pal of mine a picture of this coolness because, like me, she kind of digs gnomes.

i'm not sure if it stems from watching hours of david the gnome when i was a kid; or the fact that i would simply love a pet fox that would be my pal and go on adventures with me (i even thought about naming seven Swift), but i totally like gnomes and faeries. not in an "i also love lisafrank and unicorns and collect figurines and shit" kind of way. i just like to think they really are out there living in trees.

it's a childlike enjoyment. whatever. i can't justify it or make it sound cooler than it is. so, on to the rant.
i went to search for the images of these, and dear lord, the crap that came up instead. what is some of this shit? it's frightening. especially since there is an entire niche market devoted to naked gnomes and defecating gnomes.

warning: if you do not want to see either one of those or think you may be offended by the sight of them, then do not scroll down.

for the rest of you perverts, a sampling of the insanity that comes from searching the interwebs for garden gnomes. the second pic is my favourite of (nearly) all time. schlissweitz (i have no idea how to actually spell that but those of you who also watched david the gnome, you get it). enjoy!