Sunday, November 29, 2009

esperanza y paz

yay it's sunday! if i rally, i could have my whole house clean by noon. if i truly rally i could have the storage closet organized to make room for the possibility of a washer/dryer one day. the odds of that last one happening are dwindling as i type this sentence.
i found out this morning that my great-grandmother is not doing well. that worries me. yes, she is 91 but i cannot bear to think that she may be gone anytime soon. last year was hard enough with all of the people that i lost; losing her would be the end of a great, long era. a piece of my life would effectively remain in the past from that point on. no family homestead to hearken back to being a child, let alone my mother being a child in that house, my grandmother's life in that house. the pear trees and azaleas, the ancient, white iron garden furniture, and the goats in the back yard.
i can imagine the connective thread becoming more and more flimsy between me and the extended family with whom i have very little relationship with.
i have a feeling she and i are more alike than anyone realizes. well, i like to think so anyway. i think had she not had to leave college when her father died, had she not felt the pressure to marry and have a family; she would have done more in the scholarly world. perhaps traveled more.
i digress.
please send positive healing, and peaceful energies to her today. i didn't know in time to make a trip to see her with my family today; so she is heavy on my mind.
love to all this beautiful day!

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